The Drip, a novel by Michael Gullo
“Hello?”
“Bossman! --- Bossman, are you there?”
“Hey, Cody. What’s up?”
“Bro, can you hear that?”
“I hear barking.”
“That’s a Rottweiler got me trapped in the ho, run me in here try n chew my ass off.”
“Like a wild dog?”
“No, man. They’s a guy up here, got a red beater, let the dog out, and it come right at me.”
“What the…”
“Dude’s coming over. This fuckin’ dog’s nuts. Ain’t broke eye contact.”
“Who – what – is – where’s everyone else?”
“Tanner n’ Dev’s in the shed, and Rusty’s up there ferryin’ dirt. I come down the yard fuel up, and this guy pull in.”
“I’m at Food City. I left my cart in the aisle, and I’m headed that way – I mean, don’t get out of the ex or anything.”
“No shit. You hear this thing?”
“I’m coming, man.”
“Hey.”
“Back! Julia take him. I didn’t expect to find anyone here.”
“Bulll-Shit, you drove up that …”
“Cody, who you talking to?”
“Driveway, they’s fresh gravel. You know’d someone’s up here, and you cut that dog loose…”
“Cody.”
“…Fuck’s wrong with you?”
“I own this land.”
“Fuck you do.”
“Cody.”
“That land. I just brought him up to run free a little.”
“Cody.”
“Says he’s your neighbor, Bossman.”
“Let me talk to him.”
“He’s got the dog by the collar, they’s walkin’ away.”
“Are you shitting me?”
“Like, he just got the dog – told you you’re on his land and walked…”
“Says he owns the land next door.”
“Bro, don’t let him leave. I’m almost there.”
“How I’ma stop him?”
“I’m coming, Cody. Five six minutes.”
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
“Cody met the neighbors, and I’m headed back to meet them too.”
“Neighbors? Headed back?”
“I went to the grill for breakfast. It was a hard night. We slept in the truck again, and I needed inside warm.”
“Wait. Neighbors.”
“Look out, asshole. What the hell!”
“Michael.”
“Sorry. Driving without my little helper ain’t easy.”
“Michael.”
“So, I’m in Food City, and an eight-six-five number calls. I answer, and it’s Cody, mid pant-shit a dog’s got him trapped in the excavator.”
“Like a wild dog? You’re not making sense.”
“I’m rushing to get back, Stef, and you’re not paying attention. Cody met the neighbors, and their dog attacked him.”
“Is he hurt?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did you call nine-one-one?”
“No.”
“Want me to?”
“I’m at the Wye.”
“Wait, a dog attacks your employee, and you stop for smokes?”
“No, Stefanie. Driving by. And he’s not my employee. I’ll be there in a minute.”
“Are you armed?”
“Honey.”
“Right. Just checklisting.”
“I could hear the guy’s voice in the phone, says he just let the dog out to run, didn’t know anyone was there.”
“And it attacked Cody?”
“I guess.”
“I mean, what now?”
“I guess we talk about the weather till I get there.”
“What are you gonna say?”
“I mean, I dunno. I guess I just read and see.”
“Where are you?”
“I’m flying past the storage place.”
“Still for sale?”
“What?”
“It’s for sale.”
“What’s that got to do…”
“You said weather, I wanted a better subject.”
“What made you notice that?”
“The storage bill. That whole place is ten garages.”
“You’re right, that is weird. Ten garages twenty feet from the road. A sign with a phone number. On a wide curve. Just jammed in there.”
“Seriously? Do I hear tires screeching?”
“Past the church bend.”
“Slow down.”
“Cody said he just walked away with the dog, and I didn’t… I want to get there before he leaves.”
“What kind of car is he driving?”
“Cody said a beater.”
“Any beaters pass you by?”
“Almost exclusively. No dogs or wives or wives and dogs.”
“You there yet?”
“Slow down, hurry up. My little helper is conflicted today.”
“I’m putting you in for a re-test.”
“Wow, he’s in the driveway pulling out.”
“Block him in.”
“Should I watch out for crossfire too?”
“What’s…”
“Wow, it’s a beater for sure. Dude’s wearing a suit. Red Mitsubishi. I’ll call back.”
“Hey. I’m Michael.”
“I’m Kegan…”
“Jesus!”
“Careful, he’s protective.”
“I mean, he’s just protecting the baby.”
“He’s got a mind of his own.”
“Aren’t you afraid he’ll step on her or something?”
“Naw, he’s just protecting her.”
“I’m glad you came by – scared the pants offa Cody though.”
“Yeah, he’s super protective.”
“You keep saying that.”
“We came up to our place to let him run, and we didn’t know anyone was here.”
“Lotta changes up here, gravel and all. Hard to miss.”
“My mom and I bought this place last year with a plan to build a few cabins.”
“I saw your survey sticks. I got one too if it helps you.”
“I saw that. We already staked it out.”
“Hi, I’m Yulia.”
“Hi Julia.”
“Yulia.”
“I’m sorry. I missed the Y under the growling.”
“How many houses are you building?”
“We’re not – we’re building our home.”
“Oh, you’re going to live here. We were going to build short term rentals.”
“Were?”
“Mom passed last year, and we’ve sort of been on hold.”
“Faded ribbons told me something like that.”
“We got the septic figured out, and we were planning the power poles when mom died. Did they plan power poles right along the hillside for you too?”
“We’re going solar.”
“Like panels?”
“Yup.”
“How much does that cost?”
“I’m doing a little at a time.”
“We were kind of in a hurry.”
“I’ll move. But let me get your phone number.”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea.”
“How do I spell Kegan? Kegan, right?”
“And Yulia.”
“I got that one already.”
“K-E-G-A-N.”
“Here, put your number in – oh, sorry, buddy. Just handing the phone to your dad.”
“I’m putting the second number is Yulia.”
“Awesome. I’ll text you right away, and you’ll have mine.”
“We do have to go though.”
“I’ll get out of the way.”
“Whoa, that was some intense stuff.”
“What happened?”
“Dude was pulling out – like right at the turn when I was pulling in.”
“Did you meet him?”
“He was at the turn in the easement. I didn’t just meet him, I trapped him in the pinch between the high hill on the right – his land, and the drop off boulders that we replaced on the left.”
“His left?”
“No, the boulders were on his right. His land was on his left.”
“I see it. Paint me a car.”
“Buddy can I paint you a car. It’s a red Mitsubishit. Gotta be eight, ten years old. Windshield like mine, greasy with smoke.”
“Yeah, I always love that.”
“I can see in as I pull up, and I see he’s wearing a suit, but when I get up to the window, wedged in almost with his hillside so close to the door, and the dog is bugging out. He doesn’t say a word to it. Not a calm down or a shutup or even notice he’s there.”
“Car, Michael.”
“Serious? I got a guy trapped so close to a hillside that he can’t get his door open to get out, and I’m wedged in between that door and that hill with a mad dog wants to rip my throat out, and you want to know about the car.”
“Best for last. Car.”
“I don’t know the model. A word mangle, I’m sure. An optical illusion, bending light rays in layers of hot air.”
“Michael.”
“Fine! A Mirage. And it’s not like dirty or whatever – it’s that red thing, like they don’t look dirty, just faded or whatever.”
“Oh, I know the look.”
“So it’s dirty. I have it all over my belly I’m pressed so close at the fender to get to the window.”
“Bad tactics.”
“Even if he did shoot at me, he’d have a blurry amorph at best through the glass.”
“Wheel left, hit gas. You’re toast.”
“Did you just narrate my police stop?”
“So, dirty red beater, man in a suit. Go.”
“You forgot the dog. Low growl the whole time. Wife in the passenger seat, smoking.”
“The wife is there. Now we’re talking.”
“Yulia.”
“Julia?”
“Yulia.”
“Hispanic?”
“Actually, seemed Russian. Heavy phonic accent. Vocab great, vowels all emphasized pretty.”
“Oh, she was pretty.”
“She was Russian.”
“I don’t even know what that means.”
“Pretty vowels. And there’s a two-year-old in the back seat.”
“With a growling Rottweiler?”
“It was strange.”
“What’d he say?”
“The boys are coming down the driveway now.”
“Wait…”
“I wanted to call you right away so you wouldn’t worry. I’m bugs crawl all over me when I know you’re on a scene.”
“Thanks for that.”
“Cody. What happened with that dog? I just met him and I would have shot that mongrel sure as you’re standing there.”
“I thought he’s gonna eat me. I’m between the fuel hose and the machine, n a car come in n this dog runnin at me. Man, I just know this dog ain’t stop.”
“I’d have shot him.”
“Buddy, pull a gun, get in the cab, same time – no gun.”
“The whole scene’s a sight. I mean it’s not ten minutes you’re on the phone, and I’m in the driveway. Same trip is twelve minutes lollygagging so I can get the whole cigarette smoked. I passed in the middle, flattened the curves, gunned the straightaways; couldn’t have took me ten minutes, and he’s already at the end of the driveway when I get here.”
“Unreal.”
“What’s with the suit?”
“That was nuts, guy walkin’ casual in church shoes, get a dog got a man treed, and he on a stroll thoo the mud.”
“Quick thinking, get inside though.”
“No thinkin’. Scared.”
“I’ll back up, let you two out.”
“He got outa here fast. You meet him?”
“I pinned him right where you’re at.”
“Suit’s weird. Old lady got jeans hike boots. They not at some funeral or the like. He got appointment, and she drive him, looks like to me.”
“And they come here before they go change?”
“Like I said, ain’t right.”
“Can’t wait to celebrate.”
“What’s that, honey?”
“It’s like the whole family humps up in the car, and they go somewhere with the important one, and now it’s over, they come celebrate.”
“You got a clue there – pull it.”
“I mean, why put the whole family in the car – dog and all, but only one is dressed up – girls get dressed up any chance we get – my man in a suit. That’s an occasion.”
“I’ll back up. Go ahead, honey.”
“Maybe a job interview?”
“Got a new job, and they came up to celebrate – planning the build? Mostly they said… Man that’s a blind curve. I almost got hit again backing out.”
“Did you get the guy’s number?”
“I wonder where those two go every day.”
“Did you get the guy’s number?”
“Yes. He put his and his wife. That reminds me, I have to text him.”
“Why do you have to text him?”
“So he has my number, and because I said so.”
“What are you gonna say?”
“I guess just that this is my number.”
“What about buying the land?”
“You should have seen this car. It was exactly what you imagine when you hear light gray interior, smoker, and a dog that ran in mud.”
“I see the connection – can you zoom it?”
“Faster?”
“Zoom in. Dirty car, man in suit.”
“When Patrick looked up the land, he said it changed hands in October of 2022, and they paid eighty-thousand.”
“There he is.”
“We don’t have eighty-thousand, honey.”
“Okay, eighty-thousand is new to me. Last I had he inherited it.”
“He did, but there’s a date-of-death-valuation comes with an inheritance – a cost basis for the exempt tax and the future capital gain.”
“So it’s free to him.”
“Sort of. But he knows the value.”
“Junk car though?”
“Complete.”
“What’s the suit like?”
“Sears-sucker.”
“That’s good.”
“What’s on your mind?”
“Maybe he can’t build.”
“He can’t buy a Lowes shed.”
“He was super interested in our electricity.”
“Like the solar?”
“Sort of. Like he got a plan to power his site, and he wanted to know if we got the same plan.”
“That’s Phil calling. I sent him to voicemail twice.”
“Okay. I’m gonna put together a text and get back to work. The next contractor guy is due in like half an hour, and now I gotta send the butler for my groceries.”
“K, love you.”
“I love you too.”